“There’s a she wolf in your closet. let it out so it can breathe”
Shakira’s song. Its been running in my head and I’ve been singing it all day.
That one line really makes me think about a lot of things. Ever thought about how many things or talents are hidden in a person that they don’t show to the world just cause of fear???
Fear of failure. Fear of being mocked at.. whatever it is, there are times that you want to speak up but shut yourself up .. when you know you could shine doing something but think about what other people might have to say about it or may be the feeling that your just not good enough.
I’ve had these phases often. Sometimes i feel i could take on this world and i’m high on life. that nothing could be better and sometimes..ah, just the opposite .. the feeling that someone else is always better than me. may be I am just not good enough or when someone said i should may be start blogging about fashion i sort of somewhere start comparing myself to all the other bloggers and think it wont work.
Everyone goes through this at a certain point but to what extent??
Frankly, i wish i had an answer to that. .. if only i knew what i could do about it. may be i’d be out there doing something .. actually doing so many things that I’ve been wanting to .. i know i have all the support .. and love but i guess sometimes no matter how much you want to try and push yourself you just can’t .. Are there ways where you can just let yourself be the way you want to .. walk out in public and feel good .. I’ve been sort of hiding behind my husband. i stammer even when a waitress asks me what i want to drink. This is sooo sooo not me. I really dint think leaving Abu Dhabi would make it so hard. I mean starting a new life for me should be easy considering I’ve moved places already and haven’t had issues doing it. Why now then??
I guess i’ll just need patience and a kick in my butt 😛 to start fresh 🙂
Mid year and i’m making resolutions for myself here 🙂
“Fear is inevitable, I have to accept that, but I cannot allow it to paralyze me.” ~Isabel Allende
- i just want to be able to walk up to someone and be able to talk.
- Be comfortable when I get out
- Stop Over thinking and Calm down
I just hope i finally find some courage and move out of this hibernation mode that I am in. Break through shells. Pave new way .. and I know through this my Husband is always going to be there with me .. I’m glad he is being patient for now 🙂 but i guess I’ve to just make changes myself and start Life and take one step at a time. For now i can only hope I get more confident with time 🙂 Journeys have to start somewhere .. Life really has to move forward. Big plans. Why stop when there is so much to do and so many places to get to? Changes to make like RG (hubby boy) says 🙂
Some day baby .. some day ..
for noww ..Life, Here i come 🙂 *boxing gloves on*